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How Am I Supposed to Show My Love?



By Archimandrite Andrew (Konanos)

Come to your beloved person and tell how much you love him, kiss him and show him all your tenderness.

One of my acquaintances received a blessing from his spiritual father to consume some meat even during Great Lent because he works physically a lot and gets very tired. However. His wife is keeping the fast rather strictly, and this is why she is worrying and reproaching him because he does not go to church often. Her husband said to me: “Father, I can’t stand it anymore. Tell her something, She will listen to you”. I replied: “Who told you she would listen to me? What is wrong with her behavior? What is the problem?” And he told me: “Here is what’s going on. I am not obsessed with meat, but since I work physically all day long, I have to consume it. As soon as I am going to eat a piece of meat, she comes to the table and stands near. “Why are you eating meat?” Father, I perceive what I eat as lenten food. Is this steak really insolent? But my wife doesn’t let me eat in peace. I seems I’m not fed with the steak, but what I’m really fed up with is her constant grievance”.

I spoke to his wife, but she did not understand me, too. She does not even want to. I advised her: “Let him be. God doesn’t demand fasting from him now. Show your husband your love at first, and then you can do what you want”. – “No, father, I ask him to listen to all your lectures so that he become better”. – “But he doesn’t want to do this.” – “He must do this anyway”.

Try to solve your problems. Strange situations happen sometimes. I am sure you think sometimes, “It is so good I have married”, while the other time you may think, “Wasn’t it a wrong decision?” Everyone experience such periods. Everyone is good. Say to your beloved person how sincerely you love him and kiss him. Say “my love” when you address him and give him all your warm. Will you do this? You will not!.. I know it can be difficult for you, you may feel embarrassed. One woman said to me: “I can’t do what you ask me to do, but I can show him my feelings in another way”. – “In what way?” – “I will cook some rolls of grape leaves. He loves them very much, and thus he will understand everything”.

One child told be a similar story: “When my mother wants to please me, she cooks pasticcio. But when she is angry about me, she cooks bamia!

I understand. You have problems now. It hurts… I would like to accompany you a bit. For no reason, I will not teach you at all. I just want to be with you. You wrote to me at Facebook about this great sorrow you faced. I know what is going on. You told me about everything. I want only one thing: let us pray to Christ together, let us appeal to His grace, His strength and feel His presence and help.

From the book by Fr. Andrew (Konanos), 
“There are certain difficulties in the marriage…”

Translated by The Catalog of Good Deeds


Source: http://pravlife.org/ru/content/arhim-andrey-konanos-sovetuet-kak-pravilno-pokazat-svoyu-lyubov-samym-blizkim-lyudyam

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