Practical Tips: How to Make the Right Choice of an Orthodox Spouse?

  • First of all, you should figure out what Orthodoxy is for him/her. To begin with, it is enough to look at the pages of your chosen one in social networks: is there any profanity, vulgarity, superstition, occultism or sacrilege?
  • If a person is not a churchgoer, you should find out the reason: was it due to ignorance or is the person inwardly hardened/indifferent.
  • Try to understand the extent to which your ideas about ascetic feats in marriage coincide (someone is only willing to enter into physical union for the purpose of procreation, or wants to refrain from sex during all multi-day fasting periods).
  • A girl should check the young man’s responsibility, and the young man should check the girl’s stubbornness, her ability to step back and to compromise in disputes. The only child in the family is often raised selfish. Children from single-parent families may have psychological defects and traumas.
  • Watch the way your chosen one communicates with his family and friends. At least how he talks with them on the phone.
  • Test your chosen one in a challenging situation, ranging from a collective hiking trip to gluing wallpaper together.
  • Learn how he or she reacts to stress: is he or she proactive, apathetic or hysterical.
  • Remember that alcoholism does not always manifest itself in excessive consumption of hard liquor at parties: it might involve daily consumption of small doses (even of beer) or periodic drinking sprees.
  • Find out in advance how your chosen one views the basic policies: roles of spouses in the family, number of children, place of cohabitation, budget allocation… Being able and willing to change, to correct their mistakes, to apologize for them, to feel guilty is an important feature.
  • Take your time with the wedding, time heals the dictate of feelings over the mind and opens your eyes to something you did not want to notice earlier.



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